Would you like a free ham with that?
"That'll be $101.19." said the cashier at bigg's Hyde Park (which is really in Oakley).
Drat. That was more than I had gotten out of the ATM - I'd have to use my credit card.
As I swiped it, the cashier's voice grew serious. "All right, now, let me explain something to you. When you sign there, my drawer's gonna pop open. When I shut it - since you spent more than 50 dollars ..."
I listened, rapt.
"... a coupon is gonna come out."
Whew. I was thinking I was going to have to make a run for it for some reason.
"And this coupon, if you get six of 'em, you can bring 'em in for a free ham," she continued.
"Really?" I said, getting kind of excited. "I could get a free ham?"
"Well, not at the deli," she said. "They show, like, a honey-baked ham on the coupon, so I'm hopin' that's what they'll give out."
"Well, thank you!" I said. "I would certainly like a free ham."
I practically skipped out of the grocery store, y'all. Hams are expensive, and I am one-sixth of the way to getting myself a free one.